Narcissistic Abusers as Murderers and the Silent Epidemic of Narcissistic Abuse Suicides






Unmasking the Truth: Narcissistic Abusers as Murderers and the Silent Epidemic of Narcissistic Abuse Suicides

In the shadows of society, a chilling truth remains concealed—a truth that demands our attention, our empathy, and our action. Each year, victims of narcissistic abuse are driven to the brink of despair, and some make the heart-wrenching decision to end their own lives. We cannot turn away from this horrific reality any longer. It's time to call narcissistic abusers what they are—murderers—and to shine a glaring spotlight on the silent epidemic of narcissistic abuse suicides. These murderers walk among us, moving on to new victims unseen. We must demand legal accountability and declare that narcissistic abuse should be illegal in all 50 states.

Murderers in Plain Sight

Narcissistic abusers are not just manipulative tormentors; they are murderers. They prey upon the vulnerable, systematically dismantling their victims' self-worth and driving them to the brink of suicide. Their actions result in lives lost, families shattered, and communities forever scarred.

The Hidden Epidemic

Behind the statistics and the headlines, there are untold stories of silent suffering. Victims of narcissistic abuse endure torment that most cannot fathom. Their abusers rob them of their self-esteem, manipulate their reality, and push them into the abyss of despair. The silent epidemic of narcissistic abuse suicides is an unspeakable tragedy that remains hidden from view.

Accountability and Justice

It is time to demand accountability and justice for these silent murders. Abusers who drive their victims to suicide must face the legal consequences of their actions. No one should be allowed to escape responsibility for the lives they destroy.

A Call for Legal Action

Narcissistic abuse should be illegal in all 50 states. It is not just emotional manipulation; it is emotional murder. The law must recognize the devastating impact of this abuse and take action to protect victims.

We cannot let this cycle of abuse continue. We must raise our voices, demand legal action, and provide support to those who suffer. Society must recognize the severity of narcissistic abuse and take steps to prevent future victims from falling into the clutches of these murderers.

A Cry for Justice

The victims of narcissistic abuse who are driven to suicide are not just statistics; they are lives lost to murder. It is our moral obligation to demand justice, accountability, and legal action against these abusers. We must declare that narcissistic abuse should be illegal in all 50 states and work tirelessly to prevent more silent deaths. Let us be the voice for those who can no longer speak, and let us be the force for change that this silent epidemic so desperately needs.


Narcissistic abuse thrives on secrecy and manipulation, making it challenging for survivors to find validation and clarity. A diary becomes a lifeline in this journey, offering a sanctuary where survivors can record events, express emotions, and reclaim their truth. By wielding the power of the pen, survivors of narcissistic abuse regain control over their narratives, providing a roadmap toward healing, recovery, and liberation from the shackles of manipulation.


A Desperate Plea to Save Victims of Narcissistic Abuse

Breaking the Chains of Silent Suffering: A Desperate Plea to Save Victims of Narcissistic Abuse



In the darkest corners of our world, a silent and agonizing crisis unfolds. Every year, countless victims of narcissistic abuse, tormented by relentless emotional and psychological agony, are driven to the brink of despair. Their stories remain unheard, their cries go unanswered, and their abusers, free of accountability, move on to their next prey. We stand witness to a grave injustice, a cycle of abuse so devastating that it leads to the ultimate tragedy: murder by suicide. In this blog post, we make a desperate plea for action, to save these victims whose stories remain hidden in the shadows.

The Unbearable Silence

Behind closed doors, behind smiles that mask inner torment, there are victims who bear the weight of narcissistic abuse every day. They are our friends, our family, our neighbors—people living in silent suffering. Their voices are stifled by fear, shame, and despair, leaving them trapped in a nightmare they did not choose.

The Inescapable Torment

Narcissistic abuse is a relentless tormentor, shattering self-esteem, warping reality, and trapping victims in a never-ending cycle of manipulation. The pain is excruciating, but the silence that accompanies it is equally agonizing. It is a silence that permits the abuse to continue unchecked.

The Murder by Suicide: A Cry for Help

For some, the despair becomes too much to bear. They are pushed to the precipice, choosing death as the only escape from the torment. We must recognize that these suicides are not just tragedies; they are murders, the result of insidious abuse that drove victims to the edge.

The Perpetuation of Abuse: A Call to Action

Each suicide leaves a trail of devastation and countless unanswered questions. Worse yet, it allows abusers to continue their reign of terror, unchallenged and unaccountable. It is a cycle of abuse that claims lives and destroys futures.

A Desperate Plea for Action

We cannot stand idle any longer. We must raise our voices, shed light on this hidden crisis, and demand change. We must reach out to those who suffer in silence, offering empathy, support, and resources. We must hold abusers accountable for their actions and break the chains of silence that shackle victims.

The victims of narcissistic abuse who are driven to suicide are not just statistics; they are individuals who deserve to live free from the torment that plagues them. It is our collective responsibility to act, to raise awareness, to provide resources, and to demand justice. Let us turn the tide, break the cycle of abuse, and save lives. Together, we can make a difference.

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The Unseen Epidemic: Hidden Suicides in the Shadows of Narcissistic Abuse

Hidden Suicides in the Shadows of Narcissistic Abuse

In the darkest corners of our society, a silent epidemic remains hidden from view, shrouded in silence and suffering. Each year, hundreds of thousands of individuals endure the torment of narcissistic abuse, their voices silenced by shame, fear, and despair. Tragically, some of these victims find their escape from this relentless agony in the darkest way possible. In this blog post, we unveil the heart-wrenching truth about narcissistic abuse-related suicides, a crisis that remains severely underreported, leaving countless stories untold.

The Painful Silence of Underreporting

Narcissistic abuse leaves scars that run deeper than the eye can see. It leads to relentless emotional and psychological suffering that, for some, becomes unbearable. But the true extent of this crisis remains concealed, buried beneath layers of shame and stigma.

The Unseen Victims

Behind each statistic lies a human being—an individual who endured not only physical and emotional torment but also a daily battle to protect their shattered sense of self. These victims are fathers, mothers, sons, daughters, friends—people whose stories remain locked in silence.

The Torment That Knows No Borders

Narcissistic abuse knows no boundaries, affecting people of all backgrounds, ages, and genders. It infiltrates homes, workplaces, and communities, leaving victims isolated and voiceless.

The Desperate Escape: Hidden Suicides

For some victims, the relentless suffering becomes too much to bear. They see no way out, no relief from the torment that has become their daily existence. In desperation, they choose to end their own lives, believing it to be the only escape from the abyss of narcissistic abuse.

The Urgent Need for Awareness

The underreporting of narcissistic abuse-related suicides perpetuates a dangerous cycle of silence. Society must recognize the extent of this crisis and the lives it claims each year. By shedding light on these hidden tragedies, we can begin to understand the urgency of addressing narcissistic abuse and providing support to those who suffer in silence.

Breaking the Chains of Silence: A Call to Action

It is our collective responsibility to break the chains of silence that shackle victims of narcissistic abuse. By raising awareness, supporting organizations that provide help, and reaching out to those who may be suffering, we can offer a lifeline to those who feel trapped in despair.

The  world of narcissistic abuse hides countless untold stories of suffering and tragedy. The underreporting of narcissistic abuse-related suicides is a grave injustice to the victims who silently endure and ultimately lose their lives. It is our duty to raise our voices, to shine a light on this hidden crisis, and to offer hope to those who believe they have none. Together, we can make a difference, and together, we can save lives.


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The Heartbreaking Grip of Cognitive Dissonance in Abusive Relationships

The Heartbreaking Grip of Cognitive Dissonance in Abusive Relationships

Within the haunting labyrinth of abusive relationships, cognitive dissonance emerges as a relentless specter, quietly but painfully tearing at the souls of its victims. This psychological torment is the unseen force that keeps individuals trapped in a harrowing cycle of love and abuse. In this blog post, we will explore this gripping cycle, aiming to offer a raw glimpse into the emotional turmoil victims endure, often pushing them to the precipice of despair.

The Cycle Begins: Love versus Abuse

At its core, cognitive dissonance encapsulates the heart-wrenching contradiction between the love and attachment victims feel for their abusers and the relentless pain they experience daily. Victims often cling to memories of a once-charming partner, now eclipsed by the torment they endure.

Desperate Justifications and Denial

To cope with this searing internal conflict, victims engage in a desperate dance of justifications and denials. They tell themselves that they somehow provoked the abuse or that their partner didn't mean to hurt them. These mental defenses become their fragile shields against the overwhelming emotional storm.

The Unpredictable Emotional Rollercoaster

Abusive relationships become relentless emotional rollercoasters, with moments of tenderness and affection emerging like rare, fragile blooms amidst a field of thorns. These fleeting moments become lifelines, perpetuating the victim's attachment and deepening their cognitive dissonance.

Isolation and Loss of Self

Abusers are adept isolators, severing victims from their support networks. This isolation amplifies cognitive dissonance, transforming it into an agonizing solitary battle. Victims not only lose their sense of self but also their connections to those who might rescue them.

A Glimpse into the Abyss: Despair and Suicidal Thoughts

The perils of cognitive dissonance extend far beyond emotional turmoil; they extend into the realm of existential danger. The relentless internal battle, combined with crushing self-blame and isolation, can lead victims to the precipice of despair, where thoughts of suicide become haunting companions.

The statistics are chilling: a significant number of individuals trapped in abusive relationships contemplate or attempt suicide as a desperate escape from the ceaseless torment of cognitive dissonance.

Breaking Free: The Arduous Path to Liberation

Breaking the shackles of cognitive dissonance demands immense courage. Recognizing the role this tormentor plays is the initial, painful step. Victims must seek professional help, lean on trustworthy confidants, and strive to regain their independence. The journey is strewn with heartache, but it is the path to freedom, away from the brink of despair.

Cognitive dissonance is an unyielding tormentor, an adversary that traps victims in abusive relationships. The cycle it perpetuates is a crucible of anguish and despair, and it poses a chilling threat in the form of suicidal thoughts and actions. By shedding light on this agonizing reality and extending unwavering support, we can help victims escape the clutches of cognitive dissonance and piece together the fragments of their shattered lives.


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Cognitive Dissonance in Narcissistic Abuse: The Devastation, the Chains, and the Struggle to Break Free

Cognitive Dissonance in Narcissistic Abuse: The Devastation, the Chains, and the Struggle to Break free.

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In the haunting realm of narcissistic abuse, cognitive dissonance emerges as a silent executioner, mercilessly inflicting enduring damage on its victims. This psychological torment transforms individuals into unwilling addicts, shackling them to their abusers like chains forged in agony. In this blog post, we will explore the profound and long-lasting effects of cognitive dissonance, likening it to a harrowing addiction to substances like heroin, and the herculean effort required to break free.

The Hidden Scars: Brain Damage in Victims The damage inflicted by cognitive dissonance in victims of narcissistic abuse goes beyond emotional turmoil. It leaves a lasting imprint on their minds, akin to the scars left by a relentless tormentor. Studies suggest that prolonged exposure to this torment can lead to cognitive impairments, such as memory loss, impaired decision-making, and even changes in brain structure. Victims bear the hidden scars of cognitive dissonance long after escaping the clutches of their abusers.

Addiction to the Abuser: The Heroin of Abuse Much like a heroin addict seeks solace in their drug of choice, victims of narcissistic abuse find themselves addicted to their abusers. The intermittent moments of affection, though rare, become powerful emotional highs, further entwining victims in the cycle. This addiction fuels cognitive dissonance, creating an agonizing push-pull dynamic that's akin to chasing the next fix.

The Battle to Break Free: A Herculean Struggle Escaping the chains of cognitive dissonance is an endeavor fraught with challenges that mirror the intensity of overcoming substance addiction. Victims face overwhelming emotional and psychological barriers, including self-doubt, shame, and isolation. The path to liberation is filled with moments of desperation and despair, akin to withdrawal symptoms experienced by addicts. 

Cognitive dissonance is a relentless executioner in narcissistic abuse, leaving victims with enduring scars, akin to brain damage. It holds them hostage in an addiction to their abusers, resembling the grip of substances like heroin. Breaking free from this torment is a herculean struggle that demands unwavering determination and support.

As we shed light on this harrowing reality, we must remember that the path to recovery is both arduous and essential. By understanding the parallels to addiction and offering compassion, we can help victims escape the insidious grip of cognitive dissonance and embark on the journey toward freedom from abuse.




The Silent Tormentor: How Intermittent Reinforcement in Narcissistic Abuse Alters the Brain

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Within the labyrinth of narcissistic abuse, one insidious weapon stands out: intermittent reinforcement. This psychological tactic keeps victims trapped in a perpetual cycle of turmoil, impacting not only their emotional well-being but also altering the very structure of their brains. In this blog post, we will explore the vicious cycle of intermittent reinforcement, its impact on the brain, and the harrowing experience of being locked in a state of fight, flight, or freeze for extended periods, while also drawing parallels to chemical dependency akin to heroin addiction and the alarming danger of suicidal thoughts and actions.

Intermittent reinforcement is a sinister dance, where moments of affection and kindness from the abuser are unpredictably intermingled with cruelty and manipulation. Victims become ensnared, seeking the elusive highs of affection while navigating the depths of despair.

The Brain on the Edge: Intermittent Reinforcement's Impact

Narcissistic abuse, driven by intermittent reinforcement, takes a toll not only on emotions but also on the physical structure of the brain. Studies have shown that prolonged exposure to such abuse can result in chronic stress, leading to the shrinkage of the amygdala, the brain's fear center. This physiological change amplifies the state of hyperarousal, keeping victims locked in fight, flight, or freeze mode.

A Harrowing Dependency: The Brain's Chemical Struggle

Much like heroin addiction, victims become chemically dependent on intermittent reinforcement. The intermittent bursts of affection trigger the release of dopamine, the brain's pleasure chemical. This creates an emotional rollercoaster where victims crave the affection and endure pain, much like an addict chasing their next fix.

The Perpetual Survival Mode: Fight, Flight, or Freeze

Victims of narcissistic abuse often find themselves perpetually stuck in survival mode. The constant unpredictability of their abuser's behavior keeps their nervous systems on high alert, leading to sleep disturbances, anxiety, and hypervigilance. For some, this state of hyperarousal persists for years, draining their mental and physical resources.

The Precipice of Despair: Suicidal Thoughts and Actions

The prolonged exposure to this agonizing cycle pushes many victims to the brink of despair. The emotional turmoil, coupled with feelings of hopelessness, can lead to alarming thoughts of suicide. The struggle between the addiction to intermittent reinforcement and the desire for escape becomes a life-threatening battle.

Breaking Free: The Path to Healing

Breaking free from the clutches of intermittent reinforcement, the chemical dependency it creates, and the risk of suicide is a formidable journey. It begins with recognition and validation of the abuse, followed by seeking professional help, such as therapy or counseling. Victims must retrain their nervous systems and reestablish healthy boundaries to escape the perpetual survival mode.

Intermittent reinforcement in narcissistic abuse is a silent tormentor, altering not only victims' emotional landscapes but also the very structure of their brains. It creates a chemical dependency akin to heroin addiction, pushing victims to the precipice of despair and suicidal thoughts. However, there is hope. By understanding the impact of this cycle, seeking help, and building resilience, victims can embark on the path to healing, reclaiming their lives from the silent tormentor and regaining control over their well-being.





Unmasking the Devastating Effects of C-PTSD and Narcissistic Abuse

Unmasking the Devastating Effects of C-PTSD and Narcissistic Abuse


In a world where invisible scars run deep, the debilitating effects of Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD) and narcissistic abuse leave victims struggling to regain their sense of self and heal. This blog post delves into the profound impact of such abuse, shedding light on the prolonged trauma bonds victims face and the harrowing reality of their day-to-day lives.

The Chains of Trauma Bonds:

Trauma bonds are intricate emotional connections that develop between abusers and victims, making it incredibly difficult for the victim to escape the cycle of abuse. These bonds are characterized by alternating periods of affection and cruelty, creating a psychological dependency that's challenging to break.

2. The Quiet Destruction of Self-esteem:

Narcissistic abuse systematically erodes a victim's self-esteem and self-worth. The constant manipulation, gaslighting, and belittling chip away at their confidence, leaving them doubting their own perceptions and decisions.

3. Isolation and Alienation:

One of the insidious effects of narcissistic abuse is the isolation it brings. Abusers often isolate their victims from friends and family, making them feel utterly alone and dependent on the abuser for their sense of belonging.

4. Emotional Roller Coaster:

C-PTSD, a more complex form of PTSD, emerges from long-term exposure to traumatic events, such as ongoing emotional abuse. Victims experience intense emotional flashbacks, mood swings, and a constant state of hyperarousal that affects their daily functioning.

5. Rebuilding Trust: A Long and Winding Road:

Breaking free from the clutches of trauma bonds takes time and immense effort. Victims must gradually learn to trust their own instincts again and rebuild their self-reliance, which often involves seeking therapy and support.

6. A Day in the Life:

Detailing the day-to-day life of a survivor paints a vivid picture of the ongoing struggle. Constant anxiety, difficulty concentrating, nightmares, and emotional triggers can make even the simplest tasks a monumental challenge.

7. Reclaiming Power Through Healing:

Despite the bleakness, healing is possible. The journey involves therapy, self-care practices, and establishing healthy boundaries. Over time, survivors can regain control over their lives and forge a path towards recovery.

By shining a light on the profound impact of C-PTSD and narcissistic abuse, we can foster understanding and compassion for survivors. Recognizing the complexity of trauma bonds and the daily battles they face empowers us to support survivors as they embark on their healing journey towards reclaiming their lives and identities.


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The Chains of Trauma Bonds: Unraveling the Psychological Ties in Narcissistic Abuse

The Chains of Trauma Bonds: Unraveling the Psychological Ties in Narcissistic Abuse

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In the intricate dance between abusers and victims, trauma bonds are the invisible threads that keep victims trapped in the cycle of narcissistic abuse. This article delves into the insidious nature of trauma bonds, shedding light on the reasons why victims find it so challenging to break free from the clutches of their abusers.

1. Understanding Trauma Bonds:

Trauma bonds are intense emotional attachments that form between abusers and victims. These bonds are fostered through alternating cycles of affection, manipulation, and cruelty. Victims often find themselves caught in a whirlwind of emotions, as their abusers shift between moments of kindness and control.

2. The Power of Intermittent Reinforcement:

Intermittent reinforcement, a key factor in the development of trauma bonds, plays on the victim's uncertainty. The unpredictable nature of the abuser's behavior creates a psychological pull, leaving the victim constantly craving the moments of affection that are sporadically granted.

3. Dependency and Isolation:

As trauma bonds strengthen, victims become increasingly dependent on their abusers for emotional validation and a sense of security. This dependency is coupled with isolation, as the abuser often isolates the victim from their support network, making the abuser the sole source of connection and belonging.

4. Overcoming Cognitive Dissonance:

Victims of trauma bonds experience cognitive dissonance, where their beliefs and emotions are in conflict. Despite the abuse, victims may cling to positive memories and moments shared with the abuser, further deepening the bond and making it harder to break free.

5. The Struggle to Break Free:

Breaking a trauma bond is a complex and difficult process. The victim must confront the cognitive dissonance, overcome the fear of isolation, and find the strength to challenge their dependency on the abuser. This process often involves seeking professional help, therapy, and support from friends and family.

Trauma bonds are the invisible chains that keep victims ensnared in the cycle of narcissistic abuse. Recognizing the power of intermittent reinforcement, dependency, and cognitive dissonance helps shed light on why victims find it so difficult to escape. By understanding the mechanics of trauma bonds, we can offer better support and compassion to those who are on the challenging journey of breaking free and reclaiming their lives.

Rebuilding Trust: Navigating the Complex Journey After Narcissistic Abuse

Rebuilding Trust: Navigating the Complex Journey After Narcissistic Abuse

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Breaking free from the grasp of narcissistic abuse involves more than physical escape; it's a journey towards rebuilding trust in oneself and others. This article delves into the intricate process survivors undertake as they work to regain their self-reliance, confidence, and faith in human relationships.

1. Shattered Trust:

Narcissistic abuse leaves survivors with shattered trust. Victims doubt their own judgment, struggle to trust their emotions, and find it hard to believe in the intentions of others.

2. Self-Trust: A Struggle Within:

The path to healing begins with rebuilding trust in oneself. Survivors must learn to trust their instincts, decisions, and emotions, a process that can be hindered by the lingering self-doubt instilled by the abuser.

3. Overcoming the Fear of Vulnerability:

Narcissistic abuse often makes survivors wary of being vulnerable again. Opening up to others becomes a daunting task as they fear being hurt or manipulated once more.

4. Relearning Healthy Boundaries:

Abusers systematically violate boundaries, leaving survivors uncertain about their own limits. Relearning how to establish and maintain healthy boundaries is a crucial step in rebuilding trust both within and outside themselves.

5. Seeking Professional Help:

Therapy and counseling play a pivotal role in the journey of rebuilding trust. Professionals provide survivors with tools to process their trauma, identify healthy relationships, and develop strategies to rebuild trust over time.

6. Patience and Persistence:

Rebuilding trust is not a linear process; it requires patience and persistence. Survivors may experience setbacks, but each step forward, no matter how small, is a victory in reclaiming their autonomy.

Rebuilding trust is a formidable task that survivors of narcissistic abuse bravely undertake. From regaining self-trust to relearning healthy boundaries, each step in the journey is a testament to their resilience. By understanding the intricacies of this process, we can provide the empathy and support survivors need as they work towards regaining their sense of trust in themselves and others.


A Day in the Life of a Survivor: Navigating Narcissistic Abuse

 A Day in the Life of a Survivor: Navigating Narcissistic Abuse


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Surviving narcissistic abuse is a battle that rages within the confines of daily life. This article offers a glimpse into the struggles that survivors face on a day-to-day basis, as they navigate the aftermath of abuse and work to regain their sense of self and stability.

1. Morning Anxiety:

For survivors, mornings can be accompanied by a wave of anxiety. The fear of what the day may bring and the residual effects of nightmares or emotional flashbacks can make starting the day a daunting task.

2. Navigating Triggers:

Throughout the day, survivors must navigate a minefield of triggers – sights, sounds, and situations that remind them of their trauma. Each trigger can evoke a range of intense emotions, making even the simplest tasks feel like a challenge.

3. Hyperarousal: Living on Edge:

Survivors often live in a state of hyperarousal, where they're constantly on edge and ready to respond to perceived threats. This heightened state of alertness can lead to exhaustion and difficulty concentrating.

4. Inner Dialogue and Self-Doubt:

The remnants of the abuser's words linger in the survivor's mind. Negative self-talk and self-doubt become constant companions, chipping away at their self-esteem and sense of worth.

5. Navigating Relationships:

Interacting with others can be overwhelming for survivors. They may struggle with trusting others' intentions, interpreting signals correctly, and maintaining boundaries, making even social interactions fraught with anxiety.

6. Evening Reflections:

As the day winds down, survivors often find themselves reflecting on their experiences. Unresolved emotions, regrets, and fears can intensify during these moments, impacting their ability to unwind and find solace in rest.

7. Self-Care and Healing:

Despite the challenges, survivors prioritize self-care and healing. Engaging in therapeutic practices, journaling, or seeking support from trusted friends or professionals helps them find moments of solace amidst the chaos.

A day in the life of a survivor of narcissistic abuse is a journey filled with emotional turbulence and constant battles. The lingering effects of trauma, triggers, and self-doubt make even mundane tasks arduous. By understanding the complexities of their daily struggles, we can offer empathy, patience, and support to survivors as they navigate the long road towards healing and reclaiming their lives.

Reconnecting with Your Inner Child: A Journey to Self-Love After Narcissistic Abuse

Reconnecting with Your Inner Child: A Journey to Self-Love After Narcissistic Abuse

A Day in the Life of a Survivor: Navigating Narcissistic Abuse

Narcissistic abuse leaves deep emotional scars, often making it challenging to rebuild self-esteem and self-worth. One powerful path to healing is reconnecting with your inner child, the vulnerable and authentic part of yourself that may have been neglected or wounded during the abusive relationship. Through writing a series of letters to and from your inner child, you can embark on a profound journey of self-love and recovery.

The Power of Reconnecting with Your Inner Child

Narcissistic abuse can strip you of your sense of self, leaving you feeling broken and unworthy. Reconnecting with your inner child means acknowledging the part of you that suffered during the abuse and offering it the love and care it deserves.


Your inner child represents your innocence, creativity, and authenticity. It's the part of you that knew how to love without judgment before it was clouded by the toxicity of an abusive relationship. By reconnecting with this part of yourself, you can rediscover your self-worth and begin the journey toward self-love.

The Letter-Writing Process: A Path to Healing 

One powerful technique for reconnecting with your inner child is to write a series of letters. These letters can be both from your adult self to your inner child and vice versa. Here's how this process can help you on your healing journey:

1. Writing Letters to Your Inner Child: Begin by writing letters from your adult self to your inner child. In these letters, acknowledge the pain and suffering your inner child endured during the abuse. Offer comfort, understanding, and love. Tell your inner child that they are deserving of love and that you are there to protect and nurture them.

2. Letters from Your Inner Child:As you continue this process, allow your inner child to respond through written letters. These letters may express fears, doubts, or long-held pain. As your inner child opens up, provide reassurance and support, just as you would to a frightened or hurt child.

3. Building a Relationship: Over time, this exchange of letters creates a dialogue between your adult self and your inner child. It's a way to rebuild trust and self-compassion. As your inner child begins to trust that they are safe and valued, you'll find yourself growing more resilient and self-loving.

4. Healing and Self-Love: Through this process, you'll gradually heal the wounds of narcissistic abuse. Your inner child learns to trust again, and your adult self learns to provide the love and care that was missing during the abuse. This newfound self-love becomes a foundation for healthier relationships and a happier life.

The Importance of Self-Love After Narcissistic Abuse

Self-love is not selfish; it's essential for healing and personal growth. Reconnecting with your inner child through letter writing is a powerful tool for rebuilding self-esteem and self-worth. It allows you to heal the wounds inflicted by narcissistic abuse and move forward with greater resilience and self-compassion.

In my own journey, writing these letters became a bridge to my inner child, allowing me to understand and heal the pain I had buried for so long. Each letter was a step toward reclaiming my self-worth and learning to love myself again.




The process may be challenging at times, but it's a profound act of self-care and self-respect. Reconnecting with your inner child and showing them the love they deserve is a testament to your strength and resilience. It's a journey toward a brighter future where self-love becomes the cornerstone of your well-being.

125 phrases commonly associated with narcissists:

A complete list of 125 phrases commonly associated with narcissists:

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Narcissistic Red Flags

1. "I'm the best at..."

2. "Nobody understands me."

3. "You're lucky to have me."

4. "You're too sensitive."

5. "It's always about you, isn't it?"

6. "I can't believe you'd think that of me."

7. "You're making a big deal out of nothing."

8. "I don't need anyone; I'm self-sufficient."

9. "You should be grateful for everything I do."

10. "I'm surrounded by jealousy and envy."

11. "I told you so, but you never listen."

12. "I deserve special treatment."

13. "You'll never find someone like me."

14. "You're just trying to bring me down."

15. "I'm the most important person in your life."

16. "I always get what I want."

17. "You're just trying to steal my spotlight."

18. "I'm too important to wait for anyone."

19. "I don't need your approval."

20. "I have a long list of admirers."

21. "You should be grateful I even talk to you."

22. "I'm above the rules."

23. "Nobody can do it better than me."

24. "I make this look easy."

25. "I'm too special for ordinary people."

26. "I'm the reason for your success."

27. "You're lucky to be in my presence."

28. "You're too insecure for me."

29. "You can't survive without me."

30. "People are just envious of our relationship."

31. "I don't have time for your problems."

32. "I'm the only one who truly cares about you."

33. "You should worship the ground I walk on."

34. "I'm a natural leader; people follow me."

35. "I can't associate with anyone beneath me."

36. "My way is the only way."

37. "I deserve the best of everything."

38. "I always outshine everyone else."

39. "You don't know how lucky you are."

40. "You're just trying to hold me back."

41. "I'm the most attractive person in the room."

42. "You should be honored to know me."

43. "I'm too unique for ordinary people."

44. "I have the Midas touch; everything I touch turns to gold."

45. "I'm the life of the party."

46. "You're so fortunate to have me in your life."

47. "I'm the only one who can handle you."

48. "I'm too good for this place/job/relationship."

49. "I'm the star of the show."

50. "I'm the one who makes everything happen."

51. "You can't function without my guidance."

52. "I'm the reason people like you."

53. "I'm too important to deal with your problems."

54. "I'm the best thing that ever happened to you."

55. "I'm always the victim in this situation."

56. "You should aspire to be like me."

57. "I'm the only one who matters."

58. "You're just trying to bring me down."

59. "I'm too good for this world."

60. "I'm above criticism."

61. "You should be lucky I tolerate you."

62. "I'm the king/queen of everything."

63. "I'm the most powerful person I know."

64. "I'm a legend in my own right."

65. "You can't compete with me."

66. "I'm always the center of attention."

67. "I'm too intelligent for most people."

68. "People are just jealous of my beauty."

69. "I deserve special treatment everywhere I go."

70. "I can't believe you'd question my decisions."

71. "You're nothing without me."

72. "I'm the most important person in this room."

73. "I can't waste my time on people like you."

74. "I'm the only one who truly loves you."

75. "I know what's best for you."

76. "You should feel honored to be with me."

77. "I'm the only one who can make you happy."

78. "I don't need your help; I can do it all."

79. "You're lucky to have me as a friend."

80. "I'm the only one who can handle this situation."

81. "I'm the ultimate authority on everything."

82. "People should bow down to me."

83. "I'm always the hero in every story."

84. "You're just trying to undermine me."

85. "I'm the most charismatic person I know."

86. "I can't stand being around ordinary people."

87. "You're too emotional; you need to toughen up."

88. "I'm the only one who can save you."

89. "I'm the best judge of character."

90. "You're too lucky to have me in your life."

91. "I'm always right, no matter what."

92. "I don't need to listen to your opinions."

93. "I'm the only one who truly understands life."

94. "People should envy my life."

95. "I'm the shining star in this world."

96. "I'm too good for this conversation."

97. "I'm the most interesting person I know."

98. "I'm always the one who shines in photos."

99. "You're just trying to hold me back."

100. "I'm the only one who can see the big picture."

101. "I don't need your input; I know it all."

102. "I'm the one who holds this relationship together."

103. "You should feel lucky to be in my presence."

104. "I'm the only one who really matters."

105. "I'm too unique to be understood."

106. "People should be in awe of me."

107. "I'm the only one who can handle my success."

108. "I'm the master of my destiny."

109. "I'm too extraordinary for ordinary people."

110. "I'm the only one who can make things happen."

111. "I'm the ruler of my own universe."

112. "You're just trying to drag me down."

113. "I'm the only one who can control my life."

114. "I'm the best version of myself."

115. "You should be grateful for my presence."

116. "I'm the only one who can fix this."

117. "I'm too good for this world."

118. "I'm the ultimate authority on everything."

119. "I'm the most powerful person in my circle."

120. "I'm the top of the food chain."

121. "You can't compete with me."

122. "I'm the boss of my own reality."

123. "I'm the one everyone wishes they could be."

124. "I'm the only one who can achieve true greatness."

125. "I'm too talented for most people to appreciate."





The ultimate list of red flags.

A comprehensive lists of relationship red flags https://danielryancotlerauthorandpoet.godaddysites.com/



1. Excessive Self-Centeredness

2. Lack of Empathy

3. Manipulation

4. Grandiosity

5. Need for Admiration

6. Entitlement

7. Exploitative Behavior

8. Difficulty Maintaining Relationships

9. Anger and Aggression

10. Fragile Self-Esteem

11. Jealousy and Envy

12. Boundary Violation

13. Projection

14. Isolation

15. Constant Need for Attention

16. Difficulty Apologizing

17. Triangulation

18. Lack of Accountability

19. Sensitivity to Criticism

20. Superficial Charm

21. Love-Bombing

22. Emotional Vampirism

23. Chronic Victim Mentality

24. Inconsistent Behavior

25. Unrealistic Expectations

26. Hoarding of Resources

27. Boundary Testing

28. Hiding Objects

29. Future Faking

30. Consistent Lack of Respect

31. Blaming Others for Their Problems

32. Excessive Control

33. Frequent Mood Swings

34. Disregard for Your Well-being

35. Refusal to Compromise

36. Isolating You from Loved Ones

37. Frequent Lies or Deception

38. Stonewalling

39. Unresolved Past Issues

40. Extreme Jealousy

41. Substance Abuse Issues

42. Failure to Communicate

43. Excessive Financial Dependence

44. Lack of Support for Your Goals

45. Gaslighting

46. Emotional Blackmail

47. Constantly Speaking Negatively About Others

48. Unresolved Anger or Resentment

49. Consistently Dismissive Attitude

50. Emotional or Physical Abuse

51. Frequent Sarcasm or Mockery

52. Overly Secretive Behavior

53. Unrealistic or Extreme Expectations

54. Consistent Criticism of Your Loved Ones

55. Excessive Focus on Material Possessions

56. Chronic Neglect of Your Needs

57. Refusal to Communicate About Issues

58. Unwillingness to Seek Help

59. Unrealistic Jealousy

60. Chronic Avoidance of Conflict

61. Lack of Personal Growth

62. Continuous Disregard for Your Feelings

63. Reluctance to Spend Quality Time Together

64. Emotionally Unavailable

65. Ignoring Your Safety Concerns

66. Routinely Withholding Information

67. Pattern of Betrayal

68. Consistently Late or Unreliable

69. Lack of Respect for Your Time

70. Compulsive Gossiping

71. One-Sided Communication

72. Disinterest in Compromise

73. Ignoring Your Personal Goals

74. Pattern of Dishonesty in Previous Relationships

75. Failure to Keep Promises to Others

76. Inability to Celebrate Your Achievements

77. Constant Critique of Your Friends

78. Recurring Negative Attitude Toward Life

79. Ongoing Reckless Behavior

80. Compulsive Lying About Trivial Matters

81. Refusal to Acknowledge Their Own Mistakes

82. Continuous Emotional Coldness

83. Inability to Show Affection

84. Refusal to Apologize Sincerely

85. Frequent Crisis Creation

86. Pattern of Over-Indulgence in Substances

87. Ignoring Your Safety Concerns

88. Unwarranted Attempts to Isolate You

89. Reluctance to Spend Quality Time Together

90. Consistent Flakiness with Plans

91. Compulsive Over-Sharing

92. Emotionally Unavailable

93. Ignoring Your Safety Concerns

94. Continuous Disregard for Your Feelings

95. Reluctance to Spend Quality Time Together

96. Emotionally Unavailable

97. Chronic Insecurity

98. Ignoring Your Safety Concerns

99. Routinely Withholding Information

100. Relentless Pushing of Personal Beliefs

101. Compulsive Seeking Revenge

102. Consistent Deflection of Emotions

103. Using Threats of Self-Harm

104. Refusing to Share Responsibilities

105. Pattern of Cheating in Past Relationships

106. Inability to Accept Apologies Sincerely

107. Unwarranted Attempts to Isolate You

108. Extreme Mood Swings

109. Sudden Change in Values or Beliefs

110. Lack of Personal Growth

111. Continuous Disregard for Your Feelings

112. Reluctance to Spend Quality Time Together

113. Emotionally Unavailable

114. Ignoring Your Safety Concerns

115. Routinely Withholding Information

116. Relentless Pushing of Personal Beliefs

117. Compulsive Seeking Revenge

118. Consistent Deflection of Emotions

119. Using Threats of Self-Harm

120. Refusing to Share Responsibilities

121. Pattern of Cheating in Past Relationships

122. Inability to Accept Apologies Sincerely

123. Unwarranted Attempts to Isolate You

124. Extreme Mood Swings

125. Sudden Change in Values or Beliefs

126. Lack of Personal Growth

127. Continuous Disregard for Your Feelings

128. Reluctance to Spend Quality Time Together

129. Emotionally Unavailable

130. Ignoring Your Safety Concerns

131. Chronic Neglect of Household Responsibilities

132. Unexplained Disappearances

133. Pattern of Betrayal

134. Consistently Late or Unreliable

135. Lack of Respect for Your Time

136. Compulsive Gossiping

137. One-Sided Communication

138. Disinterest in Compromise

139. Ignoring Your Personal Goals

140. Pattern of Dishonesty in Previous Relationships

141. Failure to Keep Promises to Others

142. Inability to Celebrate Your Achievements

143. Constant Critique of Your Friends

144. Recurring Negative Attitude Toward Life

145. Ongoing Reckless Behavior

146. Compulsive Lying About Trivial Matters

147. Refusal to Acknowledge Their Own Mistakes

148. Continuous Emotional Coldness

149. Inability to Show Affection

150. Refusal to Apologize Sincerely

151. Frequent Crisis Creation

152. Pattern of Over-Indulgence in Substances 

153. Ignoring Your Safety Concerns

154. Unwarranted Attempts to Isolate You

155. Reluctance to Spend Quality Time Together

156. Consistent Flakiness with Plans

157. Compulsive Over-Sharing

158. Emotionally Unavailable

159. Ignoring Your Safety Concerns

160. Continuous Disregard for Your Feelings

161. Reluctance to Spend Quality Time Together

162. Emotionally Unavailable

163. Chronic Insecurity

164. Ignoring Your Safety Concerns

165. Routinely Withholding Information

166. Relentless Pushing of Personal Beliefs

167. Compulsive Seeking Revenge

168. Consistent Deflection of Emotions

169. Using Threats of Self-Harm

170. Refusing to Share Responsibilities

171. Pattern of Cheating in Past Relationships

172. Inability to Accept Apologies Sincerely

173. Unwarranted Attempts to Isolate You

174. Extreme Mood Swings

175. Sudden Change in Values or Beliefs

176. Lack of Personal Growth

177. Continuous Disregard for Your Feelings

178. Reluctance to Spend Quality Time Together

179. Emotionally Unavailable

180. Ignoring Your Safety Concerns

181. Routinely Withholding Information

182. Pattern of Betrayal

183. Consistently Late or Unreliable

184. Lack of Respect for Your Time

185. Compulsive Gossiping

186. One-Sided Communication

187. Disinterest in Compromise

188. Ignoring Your Personal Goals

189. Pattern of Dishonesty in Previous Relationships

190. Failure to Keep Promises to Others

191. Inability to Celebrate Your Achievements

192. Constant Critique of Your Friends

193. Recurring Negative Attitude Toward Life

194. Ongoing Reckless Behavior

195. Compulsive Lying About Trivial Matters

196. Refusal to Acknowledge Their Own Mistakes

197. Continuous Emotional Coldness

198. Inability to Show Affection

199. Refusal to Apologize Sincerely

200. Frequent Crisis Creation

Healing from Narcissistic Abuse: Finding Support and Empowerment



Narcissistic abuse can shake the very core of your being, leaving lasting emotional scars. But remember, you're not alone on this journey. As you step onto the path of healing, reaching out for support becomes a crucial first step. In this post, we'll explore therapeutic avenues that can aid in your recovery from narcissistic abuse, while also providing essential resources for assistance.

1. Mindful Recovery:

Let's start with the power of your mind. Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is like a compass guiding you through the labyrinth of negative thoughts. By challenging these thoughts, you pave the way for rebuilding your self-esteem. It's like giving yourself a fresh start – a chance to redefine your worth.


2. Navigating Your Emotions:

Emotional rollercoasters can become smoother rides with Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT). It's your toolkit for handling the whirlwind of emotions that narcissistic abuse may have left you with. Think of it as emotional karate, helping you regain control and confidence.


3. Rewriting Your Story:

Trauma-focused therapies, such as EMDR and TF-CBT, offer you a canvas to repaint your experiences. These therapies gently guide you through the past, helping you reshape your narrative, and allowing the colors of healing to emerge.


4. Collective Healing:

Support groups and group therapy can be like a cozy corner in a bustling room. Here, you connect with others who have faced similar storms. Through sharing stories and listening, you find solace and strength, turning isolation into a sense of belonging.


5. Embracing Yourself:

Mindfulness and self-care practices are your moments of self-love. Imagine a garden where you nurture your growth. Mindfulness helps you stay present, while self-care nourishes your spirit. It's like giving yourself a warm hug.


6. Creative Unveiling:

From writing poetry to expressing yourself through art, creative outlets become your megaphone. Letting your feelings out through words or colors is a step towards freeing yourself from the silence that abuse may have imposed.


7. Whole-Body Healing:

Acupuncture and yoga are your whispers of serenity. Acupuncture, with its tiny needles, is like a reset button for your energy. Yoga, on the other hand, is your mat of liberation – a canvas where you rediscover your body's strength.


8. Supplements: Consult Your Physician:

Certain supplements can be allies in your journey, but remember to consult your healthcare provider before introducing them. Omega-3s, vitamin D, and others might offer a helping hand in your quest for emotional well-being.


Seeking Help Beyond:

Remember, it's okay to ask for help beyond therapeutic practices. Domestic violence helplines and suicide prevention hotlines are lifelines you can reach out to. You're never alone in this.


The path to healing from narcissistic abuse isn't linear, but it's yours to navigate. Each step you take, whether in therapy, creative expression, holistic practices, or seeking support, is a stride towards reclaiming your life. You're stronger than you know, and your journey is a testament to your resilience. Reach out, breathe in, and step forward – you're on a path of empowerment.

Stay strong, you've got this. You all possess an inner strength that's greater than you could ever imagine.


**Resources:**

- National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)

- Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-TALK (8255)


Questions for my Anuser.

https://danielryancotlerauthorandpoet.godaddysites.com/



Why did you hurt me, oh abuser of trust?

Why did you break me, reduce me to dust?

Why did you choose to inflict so much pain?

Why did you revel in driving me insane?


Why did you use your words as sharp knives?

Why did you strip me of my joy and my lives?

Why did you laugh as you shattered my soul?

Why did you view me as a mere puppet to control?


Why did you tear me down, piece by piece?

Why did you revel in my anguish, find peace?

Why did you paint me as a canvas for your rage?

Why did you keep me trapped within your cage?


Why did you silence my voice, my plea?

Why did you refuse to let my spirit be free?

Why did you manipulate and twist my reality?

Why did you revel in your own brutality?


Why did you choose to inflict scars that last?

Why did you erase my identity, my past?

Why did you enjoy the power you held over me?

Why did you fail to see the damage you'd decree?


But now I rise, a survivor, strong and brave,

No longer defined by the pain you gave.

I reclaim my worth, my voice, my might,

No longer trapped in your perpetual night.


So tell me, abuser, why did you do what you did?

For I've found strength in the chaos you forbid.

But the answers I seek may never come,

As I leave behind the battles you've won.


For I am resilient, a warrior unbroken,

And in my healing, my spirit has awoken.

No longer defined by your twisted reign,

I rise above, free from your cruel domain.

Why did you want to see me die

https://danielryancotlerauthorandpoet.godaddysites.com/



Why did you want to see me die?

In this world where darkness does reside.

Was it envy that fueled your wicked desire?

Or a heart consumed by unquenchable fire?


Why did you want to see me fall?

To witness me crumble, lose it all.

Did my light threaten your own existence?

Or my strength stir up your deepest resistance?


Why did you want to see me break?

To revel in my pain, for your own sake.

Did my dreams ignite your inner strife?

Or my resilience challenge your way of life?


Why did you want to see me bleed?

To feed your hunger, satisfy your greed.

Did my scars expose your hidden fears?

Or my tears awaken your dormant tears?


Why did you want to see me drown?

To watch me sink beneath life's heavy crown.

Did my spirit provoke your own defeat?

Or my hopelessness make your victory sweet?


But though you wished for my demise,

I am here, stronger, against all the lies.

For in each trial, I found my true worth,

And emerged resilient, reborn, and unearthed.


So, ask yourself, why did you want to see me die?

When I will rise, with wings spread, up high.

For your darkness cannot extinguish my light,

In this dance of life, I choose to ignite.

I tried to love you

https://danielryancotlerauthorandpoet.godaddysites.com/



I tried to love you even when the skies turned gray,

When thunder roared and tears fell astray.

But my heart couldn't deny the ache and pain,

As love slowly slipped away, leaving nothing but strain.


I tried to love you even when doubts filled my mind,

When our connection faltered and grew unkind.

But the pieces of our love puzzle wouldn't align,

Leaving me questioning if love was simply blind.


I tried to love you even when the silence grew loud,

When words lost their meaning and our voices were drowned.

But the emptiness that echoed in our hearts,

Made me realize that love's flame had lost its sparks.


I tried to love you even when forgiveness seemed hard,

When mistakes lingered and left us scarred.

But the wounds never healed, they only grew deep,

Leaving a void that love could no longer keep.


I tried to love you even when distance kept us apart,

When time and space created a rift in our heart.

But the longing for a love that felt true,

Reminded me that sometimes love can't push through.


I tried to love you even when happiness faded away,

When smiles turned to tears and laughter held at bay.

But the pain in my soul couldn't be concealed,

As love's magic unraveled, the truth was revealed.


I tried to love you even when dreams turned to dust,

When hopes fell apart and faith was crushed.

But love's foundation had grown weak and frail,

Leaving me wondering if love could ever prevail.


I tried to love you even when I was lost in the dark,

When shadows consumed and left their mark.

But the light of love had dimmed and died,

Leaving me empty, with nothing left to confide.


I tried to love you even when it became clear,

That love's journey had taken a turn I couldn't steer.

But sometimes love simply fades and drifts away,

Leaving behind echoes of what could never stay.


I tried to love you, but maybe it wasn't meant to be,

Sometimes love's path is not what we foresee.

But I'll cherish the moments we shared, however brief,

And find solace in love's memories, amidst the grief.

Why did you hurt me so bad

 



https://danielryancotlerauthorandpoet.godaddysites.com/

Why did you break me down, piece by piece,

With every word that cut, causing my heart to cease?

Why did you choose to inflict such pain,

Leaving me haunted by the memories that remain?


Why did you manipulate and deceive,

Playing with my emotions, making it hard to believe?

Why did you twist our love into a sick game,

Leaving me with scars that will never fade the same?


Why did you raise your hand to strike,

Using violence as a way to assert your might?

Why did you make me feel small and weak,

Leaving me trembling, afraid to even speak?


Why did you isolate me from friends and kin,

Cutting off my support, leaving me trapped within?

Why did you control every aspect of my life,

Leaving me suffocating, drowning in strife?


Why did you tear apart my self-esteem,

Leaving me doubting myself,Why did you hurt me, oh abuser of trust?

Why did you break me, reduce me to dust?

Why did you choose to inflict so much pain?

Why did you revel in driving me insane?


Why did you use your words as sharp knives?

Why did you strip me of my joy and my lives?

Why did you laugh as you shattered my soul?

Why did you view me as a mere puppet to control?


Why did you tear me down, piece by piece?

Why did you revel in my anguish, find peace?

Why did you paint me as a canvas for your rage?

Why did you keep me trapped within your cage?


Why did you silence my voice, my plea?

Why did you refuse to let my spirit be free?

Why did you manipulate and twist my reality?

Why did you revel in your own brutality?


Why did you choose to inflict scars that last?

Why did you erase my identity, my past?

Why did you enjoy the power you held over me?

Why did you fail to see the damage you'd decree?


But now I rise, a survivor, strong and brave,

No longer defined by the pain you gave.

I reclaim my worth, my voice, my might,

No longer trapped in your perpetual night.


So tell me, abuser, why did you do what you did?

For I've found strength in the chaos you forbid.

But the answers I seek may never come,

As I leave behind the battles you've won.


 

Did abusing me make you feel good francis Zerella?


https://danielryancotlerauthorandpoet.godaddysites.com/

 Did it make you feel good when you tore me down?

When you crushed my spirit, wearing that cold frown?

Did it bring you pleasure to see me in despair,

To inflict your pain and make me unaware?


Did it make you feel good when you lied with ease?

When every word spoken was meant to deceive?

Did it give you satisfaction to watch my tears,

To manipulate my love, my hopes and fears?


Did it make you feel good when you played your games?

When you used my weakness to fan your wicked flame?

Did it fill your void to control my life,

To cut my wings, preventing me from taking flight?


Did it make you feel good when you caused me pain,

When you unleashed your rage, your darkness uncontained?

Did it fuel your ego to watch me crumble,

To revel in my suffering, leaving me humble?


But now I stand stronger, I refuse to be weak,

For I have found the strength that you could never seek.

I'll no longer be a vessel for your abuse,

For I've discovered, within, my own self-worth and truth.


So, dear abuser, know that your power won't define,

The path I choose, the love I'll now embrace as mine.

Your actions may have scarred me, but they won't break,

For I will rise above your cruelty and pain's ache.


And as I heal, I'll spread my wings, learn to fly,

Leave behind the shadows you painted in my sky.

I'll reclaim my joy, my voice, my life anew,

For my worth and happiness were never meant for you.


So did it make you feel good when you held control?

I'll leave that with you, a burden for your soul.

For I've found liberation from your toxic reign,

And now, my abuser, I'll never be the same.

Silent Screams and Deafening Tears

 Silent screams and deafening tears,

A tormented soul, for years and years.

In the clutches of a narcissistic embrace,

Where love turns to poison, a venomous chase.


A manipulator, like a puppeteer's strings,

Twisting and turning, controlling all things.

Gaslighting, demeaning, a master of disguise,

Leaving scars that only the wounded recognize.


Behind closed doors, the darkness grows,

A web of deceit, where nobody knows.

The pain, relentless, never seems to cease,

A never-ending cycle of anguish and peace.


Silent screams echo into empty space,

As hope fades and sorrow takes its place.

Deafening tears fall like a steady rain,

Drowning the heart, igniting endless pain.


No escape from the clutches of despair,

The damage done beyond repair.

The soul, once vibrant, now worn and weary,

Lost in a twisted labyrinth, dark and dreary.


With each passing day, the spirit breaks,

Shattered and fragmented, a soul that aches.

No respite, no refuge, no solace found,

In the company of shadows, bound and bound.


Silent screams go unheard, drowned by the night,

A voice silenced, swallowed by fright.

Deafening tears leave scars on fragile skin,

A battle lost, a war no one can win.


In this somber tale, there is no relief,

Only the weight of anguish, no sense of reprieve.

Silent screams and deafening tears remain,

A haunting reminder of the lasting pain.


https://danielryancotlerauthorandpoet.godaddysites.com/

This is what Narcissistic abuse is like.

Imagine waking up in the middle of the night,

On an inflatable mattress, adrift in the ocean's might.

No land in sight, no guiding star to follow,

Lost and alone, with a sorrow that's hard to swallow.


This is what narcissistic abuse feels like,

An endless journey through a never-ending night.

Emotional waves crashing, relentless and strong,

Leaving you gasping for air, longing to belong.


At first, it's seductive, a siren's call,

That charming facade, the promises that enthrall.

But slowly, the tides change, the current turns cold,

As manipulation and control begin to unfold.


Gaslighting and deception become the norm,

Your emotions start to wither, your spirit torn.

Like the waves, the narcissist ebbs and flows,

Leaving you stranded, questioning all that you know.


Isolated, you're adrift in a sea of despair,

Struggling to breathe, suffocated by their toxic air.

Every attempt to escape feels futile, in vain,

As they pull you back in, engulfed in their disdain.


You're left feeling small, insignificant, and weak,

Stripped of your voice, your autonomy they seek.

The invisible chains of their power hold you tight,

As you navigate the darkness, longing for some light.


But amidst the depths, a flicker of strength remains,

A resilience that silently kindles your flame.

In the midst of the turmoil, you find the will to fight,

To break free from the clutches of this endless night.


Slowly, you learn to swim against the tide,

Reclaiming your power, no longer willing to hide.

With every stroke, you distance yourself from their control,

Finding healing and solace within your very soul.


You learn to trust in your own intuition and worth,

To recognize the lies, to acknowledge your own birth.

No longer adrift, you start to rebuild and restore,

A life filled with love, authenticity at its core.


So, imagine waking up from this nightmare's hold,

To find yourself anchored, courageous and bold.

You deserve a life filled with joy and peace,

No longer adrift, but sailing towards release.


For in the depths, you discovered your resilience,

A survivor, breaking free from the narcissist's brilliance.

With every breath, you reclaim your own voice,

Rising above the waves, embracing your choice.


No longer defined by their manipulative art,

You navigate the waters, healing your wounded heart.

And as you sail towards the horizon's embrace,

You leave behind the darkness, basking in your grace.


https://danielryancotlerauthorandpoet.godaddysites.com/

Reactive Abuse

"Why are you so emotional all the time, 

stop your crying."

It's easy to say,

when you're the one gaslighting and lying.


My knees tucked into my chest, 

my head buried in between 

My pain is so apparent, 

and then he starts to scream.


My mind is racing,

I am completely mentally exhausted.

I just want to go to bed, 

but keep on getting accosted.


I have tried to remove myself, 

he will not give me space.

Confusion and Hysteria, 

please get out of my face.


This has gone on for hours,

I desperately need to rest.

A panic attack so severe, 

I feel my heart explode in my chest.


"Baby please stop, 

I swear I'm being honest.

You told me you'd never hurt me, 

why are you breaking your promise?"


Just to find out,

he covertly planned his attack. 

He was secretly recording,

trying to get me to react.


He wanted evidence, 

to use for his smear campaign. 

So he could call me crazy,

and slander my name.


He would make himself the victim,

and me the abuser. 

He said whoever tells the story,

first they always believe the accuser.


https://danielryancotlerauthorandpoet.godaddysites.com/



What can I do for your ego today?


https://danielryancotlerauthorandpoet.godaddysites.com/ 

What can I do for your ego today?

Shall I push aside my feelings and make them go away?

Should I walk on eggshells until my feet start to bleed?

Perhaps I'll cater to all your wants, desires, and needs.

I can ignore my boundaries so you can cross the line.

I'll make up excuses for your abuse one more time. 

If you gaslight me today, I will breathe in all your smoke.

I will act like it's funny, and be the butt of your joke.

I can keep all your secrets, and believe all your lies.

I will pretend I'm happy through the tears that I cry.

I can be the problem and take all the blame.

I will ignore the abuse and go to sleep in shame.

I'll do anything you want, just tell me what you need. 

All I want from you is love, I'm begging you, please!

Dan Ryan Poetry

Who did this to you?



Who did this to you?

Who wove pain into your soul,

lacing it with darkness,

and staining your heart blue?


Who painted your eyes with tears,

and etched sorrow on your skin,

tracing the fractures of your being,

as if it were a form of art?


Whose hands molded your fears,

and sculpted your fragile dreams,

into shards of shattered hope,

falling silently, like forgotten stars?


Who turned your smiles to whispers,

and your laughter into echoes,

trapped within the chambers of your chest,

aching to be released?


Who whispered lies into your ear,

and poisoned your trust with doubt,

seeding betrayal in the soil of your trust,

where love once bloomed?


Who held you captive in your own mind,

and locked all the doors to escape,

leaving you to wander the corridors,

of your own torment?


Who did this to you?

Was it the world, unkind and uncaring,

or perhaps fate, unyielding and cruel,

or was it yourself, the cruelest of all?


But in truth, it matters not,

for the answer lies not in who inflicted the wounds,

but in who will heal them,

for it is you, my dear, it is you.

Everytime I said I wanted to die.


https://danielryancotlerauthorandpoet.godaddysites.com/

Every time I said I wanted to die

it was not the truth, I wanted to live.

Because I love life, I love people,

I love making people smile,

I love being the reason somebody laughs

or feels loved.


See, I didn't wanna die

but a part of me was dying

because of all the abuse.

I wanted to be free

of all the hurt, free of the reality,

the person I love more than anything.

Never existed,

just an unfortunate ghost.


I didn't wanna die

but a part of me did.


Fighting those demons,

the ones that whispered in my ear,

the ones that tore at my soul,

I held on tight to hope,

to the belief that one day

the pain would go away.


But it didn't.


And so, I wore a mask,

a smile that hid the tears,

laughter that drowned out the screams.

I became the master of pretending,

the expert at deception.


Yet, beneath it all,

beneath the laughter and smiles,

the truth remained,

a silent scream that echoed

through the depths of my being.


I didn't wanna die

but a part of me did.


And now, as I pen these words,

I'm not searching for sympathy,

or a knight in shining armor.

I simply want to be heard,

to let my pain have a voice,

to acknowledge that it existed.


Because within that pain,

that darkness that threatened to consume,

a flicker of hope remained.

A tiny flame that whispered,

"Keep fighting, keep living,

for there is love and joy yet to be found."


So, I won't give in to the darkness,

to the lies that whisper in the night.

I'll fight with every breath,

with every beat of my heart,

to claim my life, my happiness,

my freedom from the shadows that haunt.


Every time I said I wanted to die

it was not the truth, I wanted to live.